blessed. :)

 

okay, this is an "honest jen" post. :)
I've been feeling like I've lost Christmas.
go here.  do this.  say this.  be this.  want this.  go, go, GO!  smile!
it got so overwhelming that I seriously started to tear up when I listened to this song.
yeah, my dork status just rose.  I know. :)

I was talking with my friend this week about the busy-ness of life.
she would know what busy is...
four kids
   PLUS six grandkids (one who was born a week ago!)
         PLUS a pre-school she runs
              PLUS a small group of around twenty girls
                  PLUS three co-leaders
                      PLUS she a fantastic wife, daughter, sister and friend to many.
after comiserating for a few moments of how tired each of us were,
she amazed me with her conclusion to all of this.

she felt overwhelmingly blessed.  blessed.

I was somewhat startled and shamed.

you see, how often do I go about my day thinking "I HAVE to" for all the things I do?
rather than "I GET to"?
how often do I think that if I don't get to all of my to-do list then I fail?
ALL the time.
it becomes about me.  and then I feel swallowed by my life, rather than blessed by my life.
I get so wrapped up in being busy, instead of being blessed.

I read this post by jon acuff this week.  and the last couple paragraphs are resonating with me.

"We are not shown a steady parade of heroes
                    who became even more heroic in the hands of God.
We are shown a parade of failures who found forgiveness.
       Losers who found love.
             Hopeless who found hope. 
Christmas is a loud season, but hopefully, you’ll hear the real song.
It’s one of redemption. My redemption. Your redemption. Our redemption."

yes.  I am blessed.  blessed. 
it's not about me.  or my to-do lists.  or my "have to's".

it's about Him.  and my "get to's".  :)